By my side..

I'm just listening to the clock go ticking

I am waiting as the time goes by.
I think of you with every breath I take,
I need to feel your heart be next to mine.
You're all I see, in everything.

I just wanna hold you,
I just wanna kiss you,
I just wanna love you all my life.
I normally wouldn't say this,
but I just can't contain it.
I want you here forever,
right here by my side..

Just a little to make it big

"Makasih lebihnya ya non."

Tidak terbayang dia akan mengucapkan hal seperti itu. It is like one of a million. Setelah supir taxi itu mengucapkan terimakasihnya, saya pun tertegun sejenak. Wow. Wow. Wow. Saya hanya memberi lebih sekitar 2,250 perak dan itu bukan dalam hitungan dollar amerika ataupun australia. Ini mata uang rupiah! I gave him 12,000 to pay my 9,750 trip from Plaza Festival to Kosan di Manggarai. Saya terlihat heboh banget ya dengan ucapan terimakasih si supir itu? Tentu Saja! Karena tidak pernah sekalipun saya mendapatkan ucapan terimakasih atas lebihan yang saya berikan untuk si supir, malah tadinya saya berpikir itu terlalu sedikit. Tetapi dia menghargai pemberian saya yang menurut saya tidak terlalu berharga itu with a grateful heart. He has just did a small things yet it gave me something big to be reflected. And i smile. Sempat saya tidak dapat berkata - kata untuk membalas terimakasihnya itu. Saya hanya menoleh ke arah bapak itu. Terdiam sebentar dan membalas, "Terimakasih pak. Hati - Hati di jalan." Dan langsung membuka gembok pagar kos.

Sambil saya berjalan masuk, senyum masih menghiasi wajahku. I have been doing this and i want it be a lifestyle. This 'this' is about doing small things but it gives a great impact to others. It does not need a big effort to make people smile. It just needs a heart that is available because every one can do it but not every one has the heart to do it.

"A Little heart can make BIG things happen."

A small example of mine, in every opportunity, i smile to all people and greet them. In the office, on the way back to kos, when walking along the pavement, when i buy my lunch beside the office, etc. I greet even the Cleaning Service that i know their names because i spend my 5 minutes when i fill in my bottle with mineral water to have a chit chat with them. We can know information we won't get anywhere even from the highest level of people in the company. I always greet the taxi driver everytime i come into their cabs and ojek driver. I also smile with every security with that serious face haha. I just want to see their reaction especially the security in the embassy i pass through. 

"To see people smile makes my heart smile as well." 

Smile is a fun way to live longer

We do not know how big the impact of our smile to others. And psstt if you are wistful, just smile and your world will gonna be better. Just smile. Yeah like that. move your lips up a bit. Yeah that's it. Don't stop! Smile min. 5 min non stop! yeah. Better?

Hereinafter

Nyut.. Nyut.. Nyut..

This headache struck me after coming home from work. I haven't had any lunch and i just ate 3 yam biscuits my mom has given me with a cup of warm Luo Han Kuo because i felt my body not really well. For lunch, i just drank a cup of hazelnut white coffee. it approximately contains 200 calories per cup. Anyway, no wonder to be an auditor will increase the weight. Even though i eat nothing for lunch, as a retaliation i ate a portion of rice which is twice my usual portion with kangkung balacan, sze chuan beef, spiced fried chicken, mayo prawn, and crispy calamari. In less than five minutes, it was all gone! Uogh. And now i innocently laying down on my bed which cause my food to stuck in my belly, ready to becoming a stack of fat :( Last week an associate resigned from office because of too tight work and a gaining weight. 7kgs in 4 months! oh noooooooo!

I just got home at 9.18 PM and it really is still early for the real auditor they said. I just need time to rest after doing a monotone job a whole day plus atmosphere. Here in accounting firm, i have to be so fast to adapt to a new environment considering in two weeks i am possible to be in three different groups and meet dozens of people. Some are kind, some are bossy, some are nice, some are grumpy, some are so simple, and some are resentful. But yeah, i enjoy meeting new people and a bit jaim to some of them hihi.

The thing i like being in peak season is i do not have to spend any penny for dinner if overtime. I could eat sushi, ramen, wakame salad, chinese food like above, and else. That is one of the reason people will do overtime happily besides covered transportation fee and the traffic that is not too crowded. I also can learn things i have not got in campus. Or the application of the theory i have learnt.

But.. i could hardly meet my friend because of this tight job. i could not imagined if i still being an auditor when i am married. I also deal with unexpected time. i really really have to learn how to manage my time and money so well.. and keep my body healthy. I am being threatened by my senior if i got sick.. hmm. So cruel.

Hereinafter going back from work, one thing i always do and longing to do it even when i am in the way back home is... rolling on my bed. it's like heaven on earth.

Anyway, i appreciate my parents more after i experience how hard earning money is. It makes me value every single penny in my purse..

Oh.

Tears of joy

I got this revelation this morning. It's from Psalm 16. It is written:

⁸ I have set the Lord continually before me; because He is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.

⁹ Therefore my heart is glad and my glory [my inner self] rejoices; my body too shall rest and confidently dwell in safety

if it is converted to indonesia, it becomes 

	Aku senantiasa memandang kepada TUHAN; karena Ia berdiri di sebelah kananku, aku tidak goyah.
	Sebab itu hatiku bersukacita dan jiwaku bersorak-sorak, bahkan tubuhku akan diam dengan tenteram.

 From this scripture i know exactly how He works within me. Only He who gives me joy. The Eternal joy is unshakable, unchanging, and it is new every morning. It is so different comparing to the joy i used to felt. Only came when the situation is good, and if it turned to gloom the joy suddenly been sucked into the darkness. The sign of the joy is the heart glads and glory rejoices. On the other hand, the sign of the outside is rest and dweel in safety. In Indonesian language, the outside shall be at peace, calm, and unshakable. Woohoo. 

Anyway, you could see how loooooonggsuffering i have been in searching the internship place for this next couple of terms from the last blog (maybe). Here is the brief story of mine. In late December which is last month, my mind was stucked like no other way out. I did not know what my next term would be when everybody else in my major already got the place for intern. That was really a preasure. To make it short, i already got an offering in a KAP but i knew it wasnt my right place for my internship. Even though i would met my desire if i accept the offering but (un)fortunately i rejected the offering. The week after, i joined the assessment test in another Big four BUT they said i'll know the result at least a month after the test. And it seemed too impossible because the deadline of informing the Campus is the early January.

I remember how i felt that time. The feeling after the assessment test. When i went out from the room, acrrosing the street, waiting for the bus to go back to Cikarang, and when i sat right behind the bus driver. My frowning face hiding behind the shadow of the moon much less the rain was so gloomy outside. Not a heavy rain, only the drizzle but it fits my feeling. I could not stand imagining what would happened if i filled not the internship confirmation form to the campus until the deadline. I'll be so dead, i thought. But yeaa it was not the right response. I should be glad though. 

maybe i should be like this. lol.

 Or

Or this? Haha

waiting for the bus

in the bus. maybe it was like this LOL LOL LOL

On 27th December, a day before holiday, i applied to several company, not accounting firm. I felt no peace. My seniors told me they thought about me better in the company. I still could not agree. but yeah still i applied. Right after 16.00 PM, a man called me. I thought  he was the iseng guy from facebook (idk where he got my number). 'Halo, ini benar Syl-vi-a Ha-ppy Setiawan?" "Iya betul" "Ohh ini dari PWC." and i got a little surprise from that call because i never expect they would call me from the CV i gave on June last year. They email me actually but then they did not send me further response. They said my CV will be screened by the user but a week after that, like php gitu (pemberi harapan palsu). When the phone interview almost done.... "Oke, kayaknya sampai sini dulu aja. ada yang mau ditanya lagi? NITTT. My Phone was shut! Low Battery. Battery drained or whatever it is called. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Panick came ferociously. I immediately charged my phone and trying to call back but no answer. I did know not the name of the user moreover the extension number. 

Surrender. I surrenderrr. KRINGGGGG. I was expecting it was from PWC but then i realize it was from one of the company that i send the CV at noon. I had to come to be interview on the next day at 8AM. That was the day i went out of town! Seriously? So lazy but i accept to come. I discussed with my father about my considerations while i opened the email from BB and "KYAAAAAAA" i screamed. PWC sent me the offering mail. I was accepted in the biggest accounting firm in the world. 

And it was right before i enjoy the holiday. Could you imagine how i enjoyed that holiday?

Not by my strength i could conquer all of this.

Just make you know that The Promises are true. 

Right at its time. 

uuuuu roses